Poor Impulse Control

Impulse Control

Impulse Control

What is Impulse Control?

We all have desires and sudden impulses.  Impulse control refers to the ability to control our impulses when we need to.

Sometime We Give In

Sometimes, we give in and other times we do not.  For example, we may want to have another drink, but know that we will be driving, so we refrain from drinking.  This is an example of impulse control, when we decide whether or not we want to go with our impulses. Sometimes, we need to refrain from doing something, because we know it will have negative consequences, such as drinking or taking drugs.  Other times, we might go along with it – for instance, buying an extra piece of chocolate, as this won’t do much harm. Good whim control is when we are able to stop ourselves from doing things that are harmful in the long run, such as spending money, using substances, engaging in risky behavior and so on.  Good restraint also has to do with us being able to enjoy ourselves when this has no bad consequences for our health or our finances.  Bad results happen when we are not able to stop ourselves from doing harmful things or when we restrain ourselves excessively.

The first type tends to be more common. Everyone has moments of lapse in notions, especially if they are tired or emotional.  However, for some people impulse control becomes a regular issue that can lead them into trouble.  Often, poor inclinations have to do with sexual and aggressive impulses.  People who have issues with it tend to engage in sexual behaviors that are risky or get violent or into fights often.  These are problematic behaviors.

How to improve impulse control?

Spontaneity can be improved at any age.  There are different strategies that can help someone develop a better impulse control.

1. First of all, it’s important to do some prep work.  Consider that controlling the impulse has two parts – not going through with the decision in the moment and not giving in to the impulse later.  Then, you need to think about the situations that make it easier for you to lose control.  Does it happen at home, in a bar or somewhere else?  Are there people who make it easier for you to lose control?  Are there things you find hard to resist?
2. The next step is to remove temptations.  If you can, stay away from the places or people which make it easier for you to lose control.  If that’s not possible, stay more alert in these situations.  Remind yourself of the consequences and focus on thinking about the negative, rather than the positive result.  While it can be hard at first, it will get easier as it becomes a habit.
3. Learn to make a pause before making a decision.  Count to twenty and ask yourself about the consequences and whether or not the reward is worth it.  For instance, drinking might feel good for a bit, but then it will give you headaches, bring problems with the family and so on.  Become more conscious of what you think and do, as it will help you not go with your impulses mindlessly.

You can also make reminders for yourself.  Leave notes around the house, on your phone, your computer and so on about the consequences and your reasons for staying away from a behavior.

Finally, relax.  Stress triggers urges.  You need to be extra careful when you’re stressed out and look for a way to relax by doing something healthy for yourself.